*BS*Though purloined from a classic Only Fools and Horses Christmas special, I like to think of myself as the chap who brought the term ‘Jolly Boys’ into popular Dovorian usage.*BF*

I’ll stand to be corrected on that point, but what is certain is that the Jolly Boys outing in the cause of the Mighty DAFC is now entrenched in popular culture. And whilst I appreciate that ‘culture’ isn’t necessarily the word I’m looking for when pondering displays of acute yet harmless oafishness, I’d ask you to allow a little poetic licence as I consider how I’m getting down to Sussex on Saturday.

There are three options – all fun…

To start the season, I opted for the Supporters’ coach for the trip to Woking. It’s cheap, comfortable and has the inestimable benefit of going exactly where the driver points it. No chance of getting lost, in other words, a point I’ll get to later. And for those who enjoy a little people watching as a means to passing the time, this is the outing for you.

Though sharing a common cause, we aficionados of all things white and beautiful are a diverse and eclectic bunch. Nowhere is this fact made more apparent than on an away trip where the mid-point of the bus – where the toilet is situated – acts as a kind of 38th parallel that divides the downright silly from the moderately sensible. And as a fully paid up member of the people watching fraternity, I never cease to be entertained by the fluctuation in the mental age of most of the punters on board.

Take Leigh Champion for example. (No really, I insist!) For those who only see Champ on match days, I can appreciate why they might pigeon hole him into the category; “loonies I have lunched with.” But this would be to do a disservice to a stout yeoman who is serious-minded, hard-working and temperate from Monday to Friday, as he holds down a responsible job. That said, victory on the road on a Saturday triggers off a chemical imbalance which ensures our man can only converse in football chants until he wakes up the following morning. Freud would have had a field day.

Naturally, ladies travelling to away games by bus is an innovation that is to be encouraged. And it can only be a matter of time before the gutter press refer to Cheryl Cole as a poor man’s Donna Riccaboni; particularly if Britain’s favourite Geordie should ever find herself kissing concrete in Faversham having necked enough Sambuca to floor a rhinoceros.
*Lpic1*
For the purist, an away day on the train should start with a full English served by the fair hand of the implausibly beautiful Polish waitress in Jermaine’s; a lass who attracts a bigger crowd than Folkestone Invicta on her day. Essentially, this is an outing for a hearty trencherman who will ne’er baulk at the size of the consignment of red meat and fermented vegetable drinks that will be placed in front of him during the course of the next 15 hours. Increasingly, this is Last of the Summer Wine meets Phoenix Nights led by a likely lad in the form of one PKT Smith; a fellow who would be a multi-millionaire in the travel industry if there were any justice in this dirty, disgusting world.

For those who haven’t had the pleasure, simply arrive at Dover Priory in good time for the 9.44 and place yourself squarely in the hands of this outstandingly capable chap. I shall simply add that if there is only one good pub within a 20-mile radius of our destination, Smith Minor will sniff it out like a Doberman sensing fear. Staying briefly with a canine theme, you will, on departure, be given clear and simple instructions that could be readily understood by even the most feckless of Springer Spaniels. That’s fine as far as London, when we reach the stage that could readily be compared with tipping over a bucket of mice and hoping they all scurry off in the same direction. In short, some will go MIA and I will invariably get the blame.

On one such occasion, a furious mother once came within an ace of writing to the Dover Express to complain that I’d abandoned her little lad at Waterloo station. A fair and reasonable complaint, truth be told, and one I’d have taken squarely on the chin had the boy in question not been 48-years-old. Later that season, the same fellow’s wife sent me a text asking if I’d seen her husband since I took him to Margate on Saturday. The text came on a Tuesday evening. A few clandestine phone calls revealed that she was joking, the little blighter. How I laughed until I stopped.

Last and by no means least, is the car journey with the revered Archie at the wheel; a must for those who enjoy a little passive smoking without having to buy 40 fags of their own. Equally as entertaining as options 1&2, I have often thought of our regular line-up of Archie, Jethro, Blue Rinse Tony and myself as a classic quartet with the potential to be the world’s oldest and ugliest boy band.
There was a time when Archie might well have fitted snugly into the category of angry young (ish) man.

Yet since becoming a Septuagenarian he’s calmed down considerably. Indeed, when he’s truly at peace with the world there are times when he can get as far as Whitfield roundabout/Capel before his first bout of road rage. This can be particularly entertaining, especially for those who hold the view that real men don’t read maps. Memorably, our hero once followed to the letter instructions telling us how to get to an away game with Wealdstone, completely losing the plot when he went round the same roundabout for the 14th time. With time to kill, we were enjoying the spectacle so much it was quite some time before we let on that we were actually playing Windsor & Eton.
*Lpic2*
I’d have to say that my favourite bit of an away trip with Archie are the monologues; for the uninitiated a bit like the finest works of Alan Bennett but with considerably more use of the word ****. There are a few old classics to pick from with my particular favourites being “Why Elvis is only popular on council estates” and “Margaret Thatcher – her part in my downfall.” However, if you tire of the old classics, it’s no trouble to instigate a new one of your own. Simply say something like, “They shouldn’t give old people heating allowance, the buggers are never in!” and an hour-and-a-half’s comedy gold is all but guaranteed.

All in all, I can’t help but think that I’m going to have a grand day out, whichever travel option I choose to get to Sussex. Last time round, the people of Lewes and its football club proved to be convivial hosts.

If they could do the decent thing and refrain from battering us 6-2 this time, I’ll enjoy it even more!

*IS*Don’t get lost… *Link1**IF*

.

*BS*SHAUN WELFORD has today left Dover Athletic by mutual consent.

*BF*The striker told boss Martin Hayes that at the age of 31 he needs first team football and he hasn’t started any of the three opening fixtures. So Welford has been given a chance to join Ryman League outfit Margate, which he has decided to take up.

Hayes said “We wish Shaun all the best. I can’t guarantee anybody a regular starting place and I certainly did not want to stand in the way of Shaun’s opportunity with Margate.

“It means we will be looking for a replacement and hopefully we’ll have at least a temporary striker in place for the weekend – but we will be actively seeking a long term option.”

Dover Athletic would like to thank Shaun for his service to the club over the past three years, which included an important contribution to the club’s consecutive Ryman League championships.

*BS*Though purloined from a classic Only Fools and Horses Christmas special, I like to think of myself as the chap who brought the term ‘Jolly Boys’ into popular Dovorian usage.*BF*

I’ll stand to be corrected on that point, but what is certain is that the Jolly Boys outing in the cause of the Mighty DAFC is now entrenched in popular culture. And whilst I appreciate that ‘culture’ isn’t necessarily the word I’m looking for when pondering displays of acute yet harmless oafishness, I’d ask you to allow a little poetic licence as I consider how I’m getting down to Sussex on Saturday.

There are three options – all fun…

To start the season, I opted for the Supporters’ coach for the trip to Woking. It’s cheap, comfortable and has the inestimable benefit of going exactly where the driver points it. No chance of getting lost, in other words, a point I’ll get to later. And for those who enjoy a little people watching as a means to passing the time, this is the outing for you.

Though sharing a common cause, we aficionados of all things white and beautiful are a diverse and eclectic bunch. Nowhere is this fact made more apparent than on an away trip where the mid-point of the bus – where the toilet is situated – acts as a kind of 38th parallel that divides the downright silly from the moderately sensible. And as a fully paid up member of the people watching fraternity, I never cease to be entertained by the fluctuation in the mental age of most of the punters on board.

Take Leigh Champion for example. (No really, I insist!) For those who only see Champ on match days, I can appreciate why they might pigeon hole him into the category; “loonies I have lunched with.” But this would be to do a disservice to a stout yeoman who is serious-minded, hard-working and temperate from Monday to Friday, as he holds down a responsible job. That said, victory on the road on a Saturday triggers off a chemical imbalance which ensures our man can only converse in football chants until he wakes up the following morning. Freud would have had a field day.

Naturally, ladies travelling to away games by bus is an innovation that is to be encouraged. And it can only be a matter of time before the gutter press refer to Cheryl Cole as a poor man’s Donna Riccaboni; particularly if Britain’s favourite Geordie should ever find herself kissing concrete in Faversham having necked enough Sambuca to floor a rhinoceros.
*Lpic1*
For the purist, an away day on the train should start with a full English served by the fair hand of the implausibly beautiful Polish waitress in Jermaine’s; a lass who attracts a bigger crowd than Folkestone Invicta on her day. Essentially, this is an outing for a hearty trencherman who will ne’er baulk at the size of the consignment of red meat and fermented vegetable drinks that will be placed in front of him during the course of the next 15 hours. Increasingly, this is Last of the Summer Wine meets Phoenix Nights led by a likely lad in the form of one PKT Smith; a fellow who would be a multi-millionaire in the travel industry if there were any justice in this dirty, disgusting world.

For those who haven’t had the pleasure, simply arrive at Dover Priory in good time for the 9.44 and place yourself squarely in the hands of this outstandingly capable chap. I shall simply add that if there is only one good pub within a 20-mile radius of our destination, Smith Minor will sniff it out like a Doberman sensing fear. Staying briefly with a canine theme, you will, on departure, be given clear and simple instructions that could be readily understood by even the most feckless of Springer Spaniels. That’s fine as far as London, when we reach the stage that could readily be compared with tipping over a bucket of mice and hoping they all scurry off in the same direction. In short, some will go MIA and I will invariably get the blame.

On one such occasion, a furious mother once came within an ace of writing to the Dover Express to complain that I’d abandoned her little lad at Waterloo station. A fair and reasonable complaint, truth be told, and one I’d have taken squarely on the chin had the boy in question not been 48-years-old. Later that season, the same fellow’s wife sent me a text asking if I’d seen her husband since I took him to Margate on Saturday. The text came on a Tuesday evening. A few clandestine phone calls revealed that she was joking, the little blighter. How I laughed until I stopped.

Last and by no means least, is the car journey with the revered Archie at the wheel; a must for those who enjoy a little passive smoking without having to buy 40 fags of their own. Equally as entertaining as options 1&2, I have often thought of our regular line-up of Archie, Jethro, Blue Rinse Tony and myself as a classic quartet with the potential to be the world’s oldest and ugliest boy band.
There was a time when Archie might well have fitted snugly into the category of angry young (ish) man.

Yet since becoming a Septuagenarian he’s calmed down considerably. Indeed, when he’s truly at peace with the world there are times when he can get as far as Whitfield roundabout/Capel before his first bout of road rage. This can be particularly entertaining, especially for those who hold the view that real men don’t read maps. Memorably, our hero once followed to the letter instructions telling us how to get to an away game with Wealdstone, completely losing the plot when he went round the same roundabout for the 14th time. With time to kill, we were enjoying the spectacle so much it was quite some time before we let on that we were actually playing Windsor & Eton.
*Lpic2*
I’d have to say that my favourite bit of an away trip with Archie are the monologues; for the uninitiated a bit like the finest works of Alan Bennett but with considerably more use of the word ****. There are a few old classics to pick from with my particular favourites being “Why Elvis is only popular on council estates” and “Margaret Thatcher – her part in my downfall.” However, if you tire of the old classics, it’s no trouble to instigate a new one of your own. Simply say something like, “They shouldn’t give old people heating allowance, the buggers are never in!” and an hour-and-a-half’s comedy gold is all but guaranteed.

All in all, I can’t help but think that I’m going to have a grand day out, whichever travel option I choose to get to Sussex. Last time round, the people of Lewes and its football club proved to be convivial hosts.

If they could do the decent thing and refrain from battering us 6-2 this time, I’ll enjoy it even more!

*IS*Don’t get lost… *Link1**IF*

*BS*Ben Hunt wheels away in celebration after netting an injury time equaliser against Staines on Saturday. The substitute striker headed in a deep cross by Luke I’Anson to snatch a point.*BF*

The former Bristol Rovers forward made an immediate impact on his full debut, running onto a through ball towards goal before being fouled by Darty Brown on the edge of the penalty area, earning the Staines defender a red card.

Kevin Harris reports on doverathletic.com: “The one-man advantage ended up lasting less than a minute. After Jon Wallis’ free kick had been charged down by former-White Gareth Risbridger, he fed Richard Butler who went racing up the field.

“Joe Tabiri had been booked for a late challenge on Simon Jackson after a mere four minutes, and the referee had no option but to shown him his second yellow card after another late foul, and level the numbers at 10 men each.”
*Q1*
Staines forward Richard Butler was a nuisance for the Dover defence throughout the match, often dropping into the hole between midfield and attack to collect the ball and slow the game down. His tendency to go to ground all too easily blemished an otherwise excellent performance.

Kevin Harris reports: “With 20 minutes played, the Swans took the lead. Marc Charles-Smith was played in on goal, and prodded the ball past Ross Flitney. Olly Schulz scrambled back to clear off the line, but Richard Butler was on hand to tap into the net from close range.”

Despite a disjointed performance by Dover, it was the home side which created the more clear cut opportunities. Olly Schulz struck the post from three yards just before half time and Adam Birchall was twice denied by Louis Wells, outstanding in the Staines goal.

*Lpic1*Wells was at last beaten, however, in the dying minutes and Whites’ supporters breathed a sigh of relief.

*Link1*

*Link2*

Unbeaten after three games, Martin Hayes’ new side may have stuttered somewhat on Saturday but should take heart from their ability to grind out points going into Tuesday’s Kent derby at Ebbsfleet.

*BS*Ebbsfleet United vs Dover Athletic*BF*
Stonebridge Road – Tuesday 24 August at 7.45pm

*BS*Ben Hunt wheels away in celebration after netting an injury time equaliser against Staines on Saturday. The substitute striker headed in a deep cross by Luke I’Anson to snatch a point.*BF*

The former Bristol Rovers forward made an immediate impact on his full debut, running onto a through ball towards goal before being fouled by Darty Brown on the edge of the penalty area, earning the Staines defender a red card.

Kevin Harris reports on doverathletic.com: “The one-man advantage ended up lasting less than a minute. After Jon Wallis’ free kick had been charged down by former-White Gareth Risbridger, he fed Richard Butler who went racing up the field.

“Joe Tabiri had been booked for a late challenge on Simon Jackson after a mere four minutes, and the referee had no option but to shown him his second yellow card after another late foul, and level the numbers at 10 men each.”
*Q1*
Staines forward Richard Butler was a nuisance for the Dover defence throughout the match, often dropping into the hole between midfield and attack to collect the ball and slow the game down. His tendency to go to ground all too easily blemished an otherwise excellent performance.

Kevin Harris reports: “With 20 minutes played, the Swans took the lead. Marc Charles-Smith was played in on goal, and prodded the ball past Ross Flitney. Olly Schulz scrambled back to clear off the line, but Richard Butler was on hand to tap into the net from close range.”

Despite a disjointed performance by Dover, it was the home side which created the more clear cut opportunities. Olly Schulz struck the post from three yards just before half time and Adam Birchall was twice denied by Louis Wells, outstanding in the Staines goal.

*Lpic1*Wells was at last beaten, however, in the dying minutes and Whites’ supporters breathed a sigh of relief.

*Link1*

*Link2*

Unbeaten after three games, Martin Hayes’ new side may have stuttered somewhat on Saturday but should take heart from their ability to grind out points going into Tuesday’s Kent derby at Ebbsfleet.

*BS*Ebbsfleet United vs Dover Athletic*BF*
Stonebridge Road – Tuesday 24 August at 7.45pm

NULL

NULL

In a ground breaking deal, which will be a first in English football between a major football competition and a broadcaster, the Football Conference has signed up to a unique partnership with Premier Sports TV to show 30 matches per season from the Blue Square Bet Premier over the next three years, including their Premier Play Off’s and the prestigious Premier Promotion Final.

In a joint enterprise with Premier Sports, the Conference can now offer those who want the opportunity to watch all that is best outside the Premiership and Football League, the ability to subscribe to a monthly membership for just £6.99. The uniqueness of the deal over and above the normal rights fee paid by the broadcaster to the competition, will see the Conference receive 50% of all subscriptions once a nominal level of subscribers has been achieved.

No other competition has had this style of agreement before and in addition the Conference will also earn 50% from all internet revenue associated with the deal and allow them to retain advertising rights allied to those adverts shown with their matches. This really is a ‘joint venture’ first in football.

Despite the fact that 12 months ago the Conference lost their then broadcaster partner due to financial reasons, they have bounced back strongly from that adversity to again lead the way with this deal.

The full details attached to the partnership are being conveyed to member clubs first before these are made public together with the actual format and first tranche of matches being revealed.

Fans of the Blue Square Bet Premier can be assured though that LIVE matches will commence on the 4th September via Channel 433, at a minimum rate of 3 per month and as little disruption to the current fixture list will take place as possible. The Football Conference and Premier Sports has identified this partnership opportunity and recognise there is a niche market for all football fans who love the game at the level at which the competition plays.

In a ground breaking deal, which will be a first in English football between a major football competition and a broadcaster, the Football Conference has signed up to a unique partnership with Premier Sports TV to show 30 matches per season from the Blue Square Bet Premier over the next three years, including their Premier Play Off’s and the prestigious Premier Promotion Final.

In a joint enterprise with Premier Sports, the Conference can now offer those who want the opportunity to watch all that is best outside the Premiership and Football League, the ability to subscribe to a monthly membership for just £6.99. The uniqueness of the deal over and above the normal rights fee paid by the broadcaster to the competition, will see the Conference receive 50% of all subscriptions once a nominal level of subscribers has been achieved.

No other competition has had this style of agreement before and in addition the Conference will also earn 50% from all internet revenue associated with the deal and allow them to retain advertising rights allied to those adverts shown with their matches. This really is a ‘joint venture’ first in football.

Despite the fact that 12 months ago the Conference lost their then broadcaster partner due to financial reasons, they have bounced back strongly from that adversity to again lead the way with this deal.

The full details attached to the partnership are being conveyed to member clubs first before these are made public together with the actual format and first tranche of matches being revealed.

Fans of the Blue Square Bet Premier can be assured though that LIVE matches will commence on the 4th September via Channel 433, at a minimum rate of 3 per month and as little disruption to the current fixture list will take place as possible. The Football Conference and Premier Sports has identified this partnership opportunity and recognise there is a niche market for all football fans who love the game at the level at which the competition plays.